回到真實體驗─ ─ 職業選手與網球關係發生現象學的反省

本文從日常的選手訓練受到啟發，以自身職業選手8年的網球生涯經驗為例，從實踐經驗出發，探討一位職業網球選手，如何藉由「源根究本的反省」( Radical Reflection)，主客不分亦或是主客同體，直到前意識層層剝落，捕捉職業選手經驗的意識、前意識及原生意識，重新建立選手觀看網球的關係。首先用現象學方法對經驗文本處理，用現象學描述如實的描述現象，揭露本來存有在職業網球與選手的關係。從研究文本中發現「訓練」、「比賽」、「成果」是投入職網世界的行動方式，先懸置自身對網球的偏見，發現職業網球與選手關係中結構的陷阱，「還原」出侵蝕彼此的關係。從中發現本來與職網的「熱愛」關係，轉變成重視最終「結果」的關係，不斷迂迴在漩渦裡。接著「再還原」出自身一開始接觸網球的初衷，本就存在於職業網球與選手的關係，只是被「勝負」的關係所掩蓋。最後透過橫向的再反省更具體地看見「訓練」、「比賽」、「成果」的發生狀態，從被動到轉為主動的釐清，選手與網球之間有多種面向詮釋的可能。從不同時期的漩渦整理出來，慢慢的釐清，深刻且結構式的反省，才明白作為球員的掙扎，再從輸贏中走回到一開始打球的樂趣，或是賦予網球新的熱愛。

Inspired by the training of an ordinary player, this study takes the researcher’s eight-year tennis career as an example. Starting from the field experience, the study discusses how a professional tennis player can capture his pre-consciousness, consciousness, and primary consciousness through the radical reflection without the division of subject and object until the pre-consciousness is peeled away, in order to re-establish the relations of the player’s regarding of tennis. First, this study uses the phenomenological method to deal with the research text by initially suspending the relation between the researcher himself and his role of a professional tennis in search of its essence by then dividing it into three basic elements that constitutes the professional tennis for further discussion. Then the study reveals the variation that originally existed in the relation between the role of professional tennis player and a play, particularly discovering the trap in the structure: from the relation of“passion”in the initial time to the relation of“win or lose,”which erodes and permeates the pure relation within a player. From structure to re-structure through deconstruction, after peeling away layers of reflection, the original relation can be deconstructed and then re-structured to have a sense of progress from training, compete with constant deformation and calmly admit the results of matches. From sorting out the turmoil of different periods, the researcher gradually clarifies and understands the struggle of a player after a deep and structural reflection, and then returns to the initial fun of playing tennis whether the researches wins or loses or create the tennis new love.