幸福的說話習慣－習慣領域與溝通理論的對話

Ways to Speak with Happiness

本文從作者個人經驗與觀察，揭示說話習慣與幸福感的關係密切。接著結合習慣領域及溝通理論，擬出幸福說話三心法，分別是相互性、平等性與整體性。然後鼓勵讀者養成幸福說話術的三不與三要習慣，分別是不說負面的話、不要在情緒失控下開口，不要只想到自己等三不，以及完美的說話始於智慧的傾聽、真誠的感謝、欣賞與讚美及理性不失溫度等三要。作者認為家庭是練習說話的最佳教室，建議家人之間的對話要保持溫柔友善。最後以習慣領域的「覺、學、用、享」四字，勉勵讀者養成幸福的說話習慣。

This article first reveals that speech habits and happiness are closely related. Then it proposes three principles of speaking with happiness in accordance with Habitual Domain (HD) and communication theory. These three principles are interactivity， equality and integrity. Readers are encouraged to develop speech habits that lead to happiness in both the speaker and the listener. These habits consist of three NOs and three MUSTs. The three NOs are: 1. do not use negatives words; 2. do not use any words when losing your temper; 3. do not just speak of yourself. The three MUSTs are: 1. listen intelligently before speaking; 2. speak with sincere gratitude， using praise words; and 3. use rationality with kindness. The author suggests that home is the best classroom in which to practice speaking. It is recommended that the dialogue within family needs to be more friendly and gentle. Finally， the author uses four words of HD， ＂ Awareness， Learning ， Practice and Sharing＂ to encourage readers to develop good speaking habits.