跨越世代相遇：看見「老年男同志」   全文下載

Breaking through Ageism: Understanding Elderly Gay Men in Taiwan

老年男同志面對雙重社會排除。在異性戀社會中，他們必須要作隱形人；在同志社群中，他們老化的身體是不受歡迎的。中國文化型塑家庭是老年唯一與主要的照顧來源，因此臺灣同志，無論年輕或老年，都有面對老了無人照顧的焦慮。本研究起源於一群年輕同志對自身老年的焦慮，並透過參與式行動研究，我們集體進行二十位老年同志的訪談，本文將其中七個老年同志的口述歷史分析，試圖理解老年同志的生活，並從中反省自身內化的老年歧見。本研究主要的發現在於：一、這群生於1930至1950年代的臺灣老年同志在面對自身愛男人的性傾向時，有些老年同志甚至對自己的同性傾向採取疾病觀點，認為自己是「病了」並且是「家庭恥辱」。只有少數老年同志會採取肯定的態度面對自己的同性傾向，認為自己應享有與其他人相同的權利。二、除了上述的「刻板印象型」與「肯定認同型」之外，有著更複雜因為婚姻關係而衍生的多元樣態。對進入婚姻的受訪者而言，同性戀是實踐問題，而不是認同問題。我們看到中國父權家庭的丈夫與父親角色提供受訪者定義自己何時可以出道成為同性戀的倫理標準。這些發現挑戰我們一般認為成為同志與進入異性戀婚姻是不相容的二分選擇。對這些老年同志，成為同志與符合家庭期待並非不可共存的人生選擇。三、在缺乏公共化照顧體系與傳統家庭倫理要求下，異性戀婚姻制度的家庭成為老年男同志的老年生活主要想像，並在不同生命階段有所展現。未婚的老年男同志常會因「孝順」倫理的規範成為原生父母的家庭照顧者，而已婚的老年男同志則以子女照顧作為老年生活保障的期待。但被壓抑的同性關係會透過既有社會習俗加以轉化達成在一起的願望。四、對於同志社群則呈現矛盾的感受，一方面經驗到同志文化的老人歧視，但另一方面又期望同志社群未來可以提供集體老化的空間。

Elderly gay men face a double exclusion and rejection from the heterosexual society and the gay community. As gay men， they must remain invisible in order to survive in a heterosexual society; as elderly men， their aged bodies are not well received in the gay community. Since the family is considered the main source of care in one's old age， growing old and being alone has been an anxiety for most Taiwanese gay men. This study was initiated by a group of young gay men with a desire to see elderly gay men's lives. Adopting participatory action research， the research team conducted life history interviews with twenty elderly gay men. Analysing seven life stories， this article investigates how Taiwanese elderly gay men experience their old age in Chinese cultural context. We found that， first， while some elderly gay men adopted stereotypic approach to understand their homosexual orientation as an illness， others perceived gay deserved equal rights like other people. Second， identities of Taiwanese elderly gay men are fluid due to their choice of marriage. We found that many Taiwanese elderly gay men married because producing an heir to carry on the family name is considered the duty of a son. Rather than seeing marriage and gay， the married gay men negotiated marriage and gay life within the family ethic discourse， by defining the time of being out as the end of their family responsibility. Our findings challenge the taken-forz-granted dichotomy of being gay and getting married. For these Taiwanese elderly gay men， being gay and fulfilling family responsibility are not incompatible. Third， those Taiwanese elderly gay men who decided not to marry would have to adopt various strategies to cope with pressure from the family. Leaving home is the most common strategy they used. Being a queer is to become a person in continuous forms of diaspora for these gay men who disobey social norms of family ethics. Ironically， Taiwanese gay men who did not marry tend to fall into the role of caregiver for their aged parents. Forth， Taiwanese elderly gay men have mixed feeling about gay community. They are strongly aware of the stereotypes toward old age in the gay community. The status as consumer offers a viable resistant subjectivity to this ageist discourse. But， the elderly gay men expected a gay-only community in their old age in order to be themselves.