編織翁婿的生命花布：翁婿關係發展之初探

The Father-in-Law and Son-in-Law Relationship: A Preliminary Study

本研究主要目的是了解現代社會翁婿關係的發展，隨著社會變遷，愈來愈多的新婚家庭選擇「近妻居」的居住形式，在以傳統父系規範為主流的台灣社會，「從夫居」為基礎的婆媳關係一直是社會關注的姻親關係焦點，也使得翁婿間的關係並未受到應有的重視。本研究企圖從一個新婚後選擇「近妻居」的家庭開始，從婚前到婚後，以及孫子女出生的時間脈絡，來了解現代翁婿關係的發展變化。並在質性的敘說探究中，採半結構深入訪談法進行資料蒐集。研究對象除一對翁婿外，並從家庭系統觀中聚合角度同時訪談其他相關重要家人（岳母及女兒），以期獲得更完整及正確的資料。本研究的主要發現有：（1）翁婿關係的發展如同花布的編織過程，從兩者在各自的生命中抽絲，經由整線成軸彼此的接納；婚後透過居住的近距離，而使生活面緊密編織成布；最後更因到孫子出生後使彼此衝突與體諒，而使成布印染生花；（2）在生命歷程中可看到更完整的翁婿關係發展；（3）有別於傳統代間關係的再思考，現代社會近妻居的生活中，以男系血統關係為核心，所建立的父系家族同心圓的角色權利與義務觀點，並無法滿足了解現代社會近妻居現實中翁婿間的關係。

The main purpose of this study was to explore the relationship between father-in-law and son-in-law, as it developed in the modern society. With changes in society, more and more newlyweds choose to live ”near the wife's parents.” Traditionally, paternalism has dominated families in Taiwan; the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are based on the tradition of ”living with the husband's parents.” Thus far, research on the relationship between father-in-law and son-in-law has been neglected. Our study began with a case centered on a family of newly-weds who chose to ”live near the wife's parents.” We analyzed the family before marriage, after marriage, and after childbirth. Semi-structured interviews were conducted; apart from the father-in-law and son-in-law, the mother-in-law and daughter were also interviewed. Results indicated that: (1). The development of the relationship between a father-in-law and son-in-law can be likened to the weaving process of cotton prints-through the process of knowing each other (reeling off raw silk from cocoons), interaction (spinning), integration after marriage (weaving), and incorporation after the birth of third generation; (2). Although the life course theory provides different perspectives on understanding the relationship between father-in-law and son-in-law, the five principles of the theory are all important in different ways when applied to interpret the different stages of the development of the relationship; (3). It was not possible to interpret the relationship between father-in-law and son-in-law using the ideas derived from rights and obligations established around the concentric circles with male-linage at the core.